Monday, November 5, 2007

how the war is financed

how the war is financed

If it is easy for George Bush to call war on Al Qaeda, Iraq and Iran I wondered how easy it would be for Dibby to call war on North London for having Al Qaeda establish itself in the area and for wearing Reeboks instead of Nike's. In a pre-empt meeting the standing Presdent is told about the finer details and how the financial transactions take place. My second Aunt cousin on my Mother's side, was privvy to that meeting having been left next door doing the cleaning and fallen asleep.

Money Man 1: Mr President, are you aware that the war will cost the country $65 trillion dollars over the next two years?

President: I'm fully aware of the financial burden the country is likely to be under following my venture into North London to install Democracy and a 24 hour Burger King.

Money Man 4: Mr President, the $65 trillion is not all spent on the war. In fact only 15% is earmarked for tanks, weaponry and aircraft.

President: So what happens to the other 85%.

Money man 27: Well Mr President, 30% goes to the US contract companies, responsible for infrastructure, roads, schools etc.

President: And the rest

Money man 2: Another 30% goes to the media companies who help propagate the war with 24 hour programs expressing our nonsense. We call it spin.

President: That leaves 25%

Money man 153: Well 15% goes to (NLAR) North London against Reebok, a splinter group currently fighting the insurgent Nikee's or Nikette's.

President: Sounds very strange, but OK. So that leaves 10% of the $65 trillion unaccounted for. Questions will be asked.

Money Man 2 again: The remaining 10% is split between the two men in charge of the country at the time of going to war

President: So that's split between the Vice President and myself, should I agree to take us to war against North London on the pretence of them wearing Reebok trainers?

Money man 17: Agreed Mr President. So far so good. Exactament as they say in France Monsieur Presidency.

President: 5% of $65 trillion dollars is a lot of money. How often does this happen? I mean am I the first President to be offered this treasure trove of riches?

Money Man 8: Oh no Mr President, this is a regular occurrence, happens at east once very presidency since 1970. We used to be into drugs with the Columbian's but Regan screwed that up, so now we have no option to build our next eggs by generating friction around the world under the disguise called democracy.

President: So what do you guys gain out of it?

Money man 97: We formulate the plans and keep everything smooth working behind the scenes.

President: Wow this sounds great. Can we do another one after this?

Money man Deputy: Of course Mr President, there's always West London. They wear Adidas.


No comments: