Monday, November 26, 2007

Weed top 5: September - December 2007

Having now spent three months in the land of Rizla and named weed, notably Amsterdam, I believe I am more than qualified to give a professional review of the canabis cup entries for this year's cannabis cup competition, held up the road from where I work (tee hee) 2007. As I have personally sampled and rather enjoyed the entrants participating, I could not leave my fellow UK friends without an update of the current crop over in 'Dam. This is a synopsis of the greenback since I touched these shores back in September. For those planning a trip to Amsterdam in the future, this article will provide more useful information than you get at the tourist office or BBC World service. Do not head to the common areas such as Leideseplein or Central, but find out of town coffee shops, which not only give you more for your money, but have a better variety and the weed is stronger. See previous blogs for list of top rated coffee shops in Amsterdam. Nuff said...

tspoonfr top 5 September - December 2007
No1. Jack Herrer

A strong smoke for professional's only and to be smoked preferably after 7pm, when work has finished. You'll notice by the time you have smoked your 4th JH, you have jokes to rival Eddie and the munchies of an elephant. Some of the things I have eaten as a result on being on the JH are not suitable for this blog page. You become very chatty with this weed, so I would advise you to either smoke on your own or prepare your friends for ear plugs. When smoked in a cocktail with hash I have found it better when washed down with a strawberry looza. (Dutch soft drink) This will have you flying higher than an RyanAir pilot crossing the Channel. A previous Canabis cup winner on no less than three occassions makes this the Clarence Seedorf of weed.

No 2. AK47

The AK47 is the closest I have come to smoking 'Lamb's Bread', when back in the day Lamb was considered the finest from Kingston. Remember the days when you would walk to Brixton Frontline for a £3 bag and have no trouble making the return journey with your spa's, enjoying one spliff and x amount of jokes. The AK brings back those memories and has you wanting to grab someone's skateboard and attempt an ollie. When opening the bag, for those of a high blood pressure disposition, the aroma of the AK could have you stuttering like OJ in court.

No 3. Crystal

Ahh the Crystal, I found to be a strong and sweet smoke. Therefore I cannot smoke this during the week, but come Friday evening this is my weed of choice. The sweetness taste's like a McDonald's Ice Cream Sundae and the strength of the smoke, means for you to sit down when smoking. No other activities can be performed, not even the right-hand, late at night special. This was a cup winner from 2002 and the locals tell me during that year, the Crystal was more profitable than visitors to Anne Frank House. At the time of writing you can purchase 1.6gr of Crystal for 15e (£10.79) which is lower than inflation levels of 2001. Proof weed is cheaper.

No 4. Orange Bud

Orange Bud is more widely known as the entry level weed, for those who have just arrived from the UK. OB represents Holland in its smoothness and strength and has buds the size of my rubber nipple covers. As I have elevated to senior level I either mix this with hash or comfortable to use it as a lunchtime smoke, that I can take to work and not suffer any embarrassing side effects, while I manage multi million euro's computer systems. The strands of Orange hair found in the weed, gives it clue and the local grower, Hans van Driver estimates it can be grown from seed to plant in twenty two days.

No 5. Red Hair

A previous cup winner from 2000, a good day time smoke and the cheapest weed in Amsterdam at around 5gm for 20e (£14.00) . As it's cheap, I use it as a cocktail mixer with JH. A very sticky weed, it smokes as a creeper, and it's prefered drink is Amstel Beer. After five or six joints, three Amstel beers and a kebab from the Turkish guys at Centraal Station, you'll sleep good and will be ready to repeat again the following day. The record is four days continous smoke, drink, eat, sleep, smoke, eat, drink....


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