Monday, April 11, 2011

The greatest Satirical News Blog page is back

I'm back, like Arnie. I know it's been a while, but when you are raising children, have mountains of domestic work to fulfil, a job to uphold and a backlog to porn to catch up with, it's not easy to put pen to paper. Or in the world of blogging, let my fingers find a keyboard.

So much has happened since we were last together. Barack Obama is still leader of Bad Boy U.S. , playing his part in the live reality of the 'Black & White Minstral' show with great vigour. I'm sure when little George was running tings, he was only involved with one war at a time. Just goes to show how Black man can floss. Three wars at the same time. Man. Ooops there is no actual war against Libya, its just an air invasion. Silly me. Give that man another Nobel Peace Prize.

Then we have the demise of Tiger Woods for indulging in fantasies many of us have not even dreamt yet. What can be Mrs Woods' problem? Is there no jaffa cakes in the cupboard? Does she require another pair of Jimmy Choo shoes? Or should Tiger give up attending Lap Dancing Clubs on a Tuesday, as that is the night he needs to be home, chatting foolishness, filling up the dish washer or planning the next boring Dinner Party? Tiger, I know how you feel bro......

In my absence Liverpool (my football team) have employed a new manager and then sacked him and employed another. This not only gives a bad name to prostitution but makes us the laughing stock of the football world. Now King Kenny is in charge I hope there is some stability at the club for the forseeable otherwise Rafa Benny may make a comeback and the rise in suicides on Merseyside will treble.

For those in the know, I have given up one of my favourite pastimes: Indulging in the chronic, indica, sensimillia, weed, spliff after 25 years useful service. Not only do I believe I deserve a pension but a pair of gold cuff-links and tie clip would not go a miss. I have now become one of those Hovis Cloth cap boring people that live in Burnley, whom I used to disdain but now admire from afar. Bear with me while I try to find myself, last seen back when Charlie used to take Diana around the back of the bike shed's and Love Thy Neighbour was considered prime time viewing.

tspoon - 11/4/11

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